I'm everything

Deep down into the inner world
circles of Love and Hope
I want to live as a part
To contemplate and to breathe
Be full of every being
Everything is everywhere
Everything is in me

Today

I must tell you that I'm not absolutely fine.
Once again I don't know if it's the moon, if it's because I'm a woman, or just because I'm a sensitive person.
I haven't told you yet, but I'm keen on esoteric world. Since I was quite young that I felt attracted by tarot, past life, astrological maps and so on.

That's why I started playing with the cards of tarot. Me and my friends used to spend long times Reading what could happen to each other, if our love could be reciprocated and questions like that. But when it began to become more seriously I decided to keep then locked in the bookcase.

At the same time I attended some Tai-chi classes and I met a Reiki Master who persuaded me to do a course with him.

And so I did. At that time I was only twenty years old. I was a broken heart recovering from a toxic relationship, who decided to began a new life plenty of energy by myself. I felt so well being iniciated to reiki!

But, and I still persist being like that, I found difficult to fulfil the 21 days of self treatment. It requires method and discipline. At that time, I was feeling that I had found my true way, that I had found myself, and I didn't complete de 21 days... what for?

Wrong! I couldn't be more wrong... but what could I do? I had fell in love again, the Spring had come, the never ending nights with my mates of the university didn't allow me time to discover that way of being.

Thirteen years later I decided to embrace my spiritual side. Actually I had never left it behind, but I was a kind of afraid to take this step. First I joined the aikido group, I always pretend to be a samurai! It was awsome! But I got injured and I decided to practice swimming to breath better and to drown my ghosts. Then I started to meditate in group. It was quite challenging!

I have quite difficults to concentrate myself and to pull away my thoughts. Almost a year later of meditation, I now feel that I have been developing some kind of intuition, that I can read the unwritten lines.
And I've decided to begin the 21 days of Reiki self treatment. Today it's de 7th day.
I'm working in progress. I feel the world in 3D. I feel that I am here. I'm not just passing trough.
But today I feel some kind of sadness. Today I question my capacities, all my capacities. Today I want to backpack and get into the wild.